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Srila Sridhar Maharaj: We are out to search for the Lord of love. The conception about whom is given in Bhagavatam, Chaitanya Charitamrta.
He is an Autocrat; but He has got a heart which is full of infinite love. We go out in search of such a master. We should not think that the path is covered by flowers. But it may be spread with thorns also. It is necessary to test our sincerity, how much is our hankering for that Lord.
Brahma adi deva yadi dhyani nahi paya. There is a Bengali verse that even a God like Brahma, the creator, cannot bring Him in his meditation.
Hari virinchi vanchita deva. Brahma and Shiva have got aspiration after Him, but there is no guarantee that they have got it. We have come out for such an ideal. So, we must be prepared for anything, any demand what may be necessary as the price for that. Even if we may not get Him, but still we want to remain on the path of searching for Him. There is an English proverb, "Virtue is its own reward." That I am virtuous, yes, that is my reward. I don't want anything else but to live a virtuous life. So, that we are on the path of search for the highest truth of Krsna consciousness, that is our reward. We don't want any other reward of success. What can be attained, that can be stale.So, He can never be attained in such a way that the future will be something stale.
aslisya va pada-ratam pinastu mama adarsanan marma-hatam karotu va
yatha tatha va vadadhatu lampato mat-prana-nathas tu sa eva naparah
Siksastaka 8
("I know none but Krsna as My Lord, and He shall remain so even if He handles Me roughly in His embrace or makes Me broken-hearted by ignoring Me completely. He is completely free to do whatever He wants, for He is a debauchee, yet He is still My worshipful Lord, unconditionally.")We are given advice and understanding in such a way. That for the destination, the highest destination which we have got a conception given by Krsna consciousness we must be prepared for anything else, any opposition. We shall rather invite like Kuntidevi, the Queen Kunti. She prays, "Please put me in danger, constant danger: that is my friend to remind me about you. I have thought it best, so give me danger." So, that should be our attitude in the quest of Krsna, and not that already acquired things at our disposal and the committee, the houses, the money, the power, and there is Krsna, the monopoly of Krsna is there, in the power-mongering and the showing of so much grandeur in the material world. It is not there. It is in faith, in deep faith, the ideal.
We have to consult the scripture, we have to consult the great honest men, the mahajanas, and the shastra. And our sincere heart, we cannot ignore that. We must have its approval, the deep approval of the heart, that what we are doing we are doing well, we are doing rightly. This sort of underground consciousness we must have when we go to search about Krsna.
na dhanam na janam na sundarim kavitam va jagadisa kamayeThe causeless attraction of Krsna- not dependent upon any other things or relations. Independent of all acquisition of this mundane world. It is independent; it does not depend on anything else. It is absolute. Everything has got a stand on it, but it is absolute. Exclusive attraction for Him.
mama janmani janmanisvare bhavatad-bhaktir-ahaituki tvayi
Siksastaka 4("O almighty Lord, I have no desire to accumulate wealth, nor do I desire beautiful women, nor do I want any number of followers, nor do I care for the fame of a poet, or the poetically glorified position of impersonal liberation - I only want Your causeless devotional service birth after birth.")
